70's Rock Must Die

Other album releases and lyrics by Lard can be seen here.

70's Rock Must Die

     I was cruisin' in a car
     Down Melrose Boulevard
     When I stopped all the traffic
     I was laughin' so hard
     Standin' on the corner
     Was this rock n roll dude
     In leather pants thinkin' he was so cool
     He had the jacket
     He had the shades
     Farrah Fawcett hair
     Or was that a wig
     Face like a turtle
     Trying in vain to look stoned
     You could tell he'd been practicing
     In a mirror at home
     He'd probably been posing like that all day
     Didn't matter that it was a hundred degrees nn the shade

     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die

     Bogus bands
     Plastic rock stars
     Stupid clothes and the worst made cars
     Country rock making us all sick
     While John Travolta wags his double-knit prick
     Being a teen back then
     Man, it was a drag
     Bicentennial and no one burned the flag
     You think we live in pretty deperate times
     When people wanna go back to 1975
     My Saturday Night Fever fantasy
     Lock the Bee Gees in a Pinto
     And ram it from the rear
     Burn, baby

     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die

     Oooh babe
     Yeah yeah yeah
     We may not have talent but we sure got attitude
     Suck my ego
     Pay to play
     Got nothimg more to say
     As we sell you a stairway to boredom

     Put your hands together!
     Yeah yeah yeah yeah

     Look around at the hip people
     Set in their ways
     Reaching back to the things they used to say they hate
     Young old farts playing fossil rock
     Stones reunions pass for rebellion
     Radio and TV gettin' so damn bland
     With collegiate John Denver copy bands
     Underground's becoming an alternative joke
     Even Aerosmith hates all the Aerosmith clones
     I know they don't make them like the Son Of Sam
     But even punks wanna go back to '77

     Give me a break man

     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die
     Well c'mon
     Well c'mon
     Seventies rock must die

---

Volcanus 2000

     ?
     Hydrogen peroxide
     ?
     ariticicial preservatives
     To preserve freshness

     ?
     Cholesterol
     ?

     Immodium AD
     Pepcid AC
     ?
     Pertoleum jelly

     ?
     Microsoft
     ?
     High fructose corn syrup
     ?


     Hello my dear
     Can I feel your skin
     Put it in my mouth and bite it
     I am the ? capital of Volcanus 2000
     Fell down the trash chute at my job
     Woke up on this garbage barge
     Thousand tons of urban waste
     Now I'm part of the ?

     Yeah
     We wipe the world
     Yeah
     We wipe the world

     I found a catapault
     Ever? squashed? ingrate people
     ? of medical waste 
     Rained down on their face
     Give us all your treasure now
     Or we'll paint your whole town brown
     Everywhere they're glad to pay
     So we'll go away

     Yeah
     Yeah
     We wipe the world

     ?
     And squished sausage into wine
     ?
     If thing goes bad just cry
     Rule the world from my seat
     Kidnapped ? in the back seat
     No one dares blow up our shit
     They'll have to clean up all the mess

     Yeah x3
     We wipe the world
     Yeah
     We wipe the world

     Hundred sixy millions tons of American trach each year
     Thousand football field thirty stories high
     Where will we put it all
     Not in my back yard
     Not in my back yard
     Look out!

     ?
     ?
     More of ? sale each day
     ?
     ?
     2 billion tons
     Bottles and cans and paper plates
     18 billion ? of waste
     Aluminum and ?
     ?
     ?
     And join us and mutate

     Yeah x2
     We wipe the world
     Yeah x3
     We wipe the world

---

Ballad Of Marshall Ledbetter

     
     Six hundred sixty six Dunkin Donuts
     A twenty inch ? cheese pizza from Gumby's
     Extra jalapenos on the side
     And a case of Asahi Dry
     I wish to speak with Timoth Leary
     Lemmy, Jello and Ice Cube too
     Carton of Lucky's with filters
     And bring a CNN news crew
     Talahassee, Florida
     4AM, June 14, '91
     Capitol building's occupied
     Broke the glass, walked right inside
     Wouldn't be advisable to enter
     You don't know the number of hostiles
     Or if anyone's got guns
     Or if there's hostages

     I just want to speak my mind
     More to you than just one sound bite

     Fasion? cop? and info? man? has something to say
     This whole word is disturbing me
     I wanna cut a rap record each month
     And mail my little pinkie to George Bush

     Sharpshooters on surrounding roofs
     Traffic blocked by SWAT troops
     Evacuate the people inside
     Pretend we're CNN, say Leary's died

     I just want to speak my mind
     More to you than just one sound bite

     12:45, he emerged unharmed
     JD in one hand, in the other, cigars
     Hendrix t-shirt and his underwear on
     Guess what, he never had no gun

     Aaa
     Ow
     Where are you my friends
     Where are you
     Where are you
     I can't believe it's come to this

     Aaaahhh

     I only broadcast my freakout to the world
     I was a prisinor for 22 years
     When I broke through that door, I was free
     Not to mention pretty damn lucky
     Nowadays, boy, you'd just get shot